Therapy for Engineers and Technical Professionals
Mike Balsan, Licensed Psychologist, MA, PhD
I love working with engineers. They tend to be great at thinking through problems logically and are often sponges for learning about themselves and how their own minds work. Technical thinkers tend to see the world differently and I believe approaches to therapy with engineers and other logic-leaning clients should reflect that difference. Working with professionals who deeply identify with their careers means working with highly skilled problem solvers that want the tools and knowledge to address their problems themselves. But the tools we use to solve an engineering problem are often different from the tools used to build healthy working relationships. Oftentimes engineers over-index on their rational faculties at the expense of learning how to incorporate the wisdom of emotion, intuition and interpersonal connection (which are vital skills to managing a team). As engineers progress in their careers, they often find themselves at a loss for how to manage others with soft skills when their whole previous career was focused on building technical skills. As a psychologist, I deeply enjoy supporting clients to develop these soft skills. To find success at work and in relationships, we need more than technical skill and learning about one's emotions and interpersonal patterns leads to growth both at home and at work.
Emotion and interpersonal skills are two domains that I often work on with engineers and other logic-driven professionals.
Emotions
Over the course of thousands of years of evolution and cultural development, humanity has developed an amazingly fast and efficient internal information processing system, which we call “emotion”. There are many benefits of being highly emotionally intelligent, but this trait (which can be trained and improved with practice) is often undervalued in modern workplaces and schools. Being able to identify, share, and use emotions is central to success in relationships with others, leadership, and can even impact our health outcomes. When working with engineers, I often find that emotional intelligence has taken a back seat to logic (a slower and more resource intensive information processing system). This makes sense as engineering classes often teach students to rely solely on logic rather than emotion or intuition when approaching problems. This may be helpful in doing the engineering course work, but as people advance in their careers, they often find themselves working more with people than with machines, which calls for a completely different set of skills and approaches. Furthermore, being aware of and skilled with emotion is helpful outside of the workplace. Emotional intelligence is vital in connecting with friends and family and even one's self. For more reading on this topic, I often have clients turn towards Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, stressed or unmotivated at work, you may benefit from working on strengthening your emotional resources rather than continuing to just grind your way through your workflow each week. Embracing emotions and working with them can help us be more effective at work while also helping us feel better and even live longer.
Interpersonal Process Skills
The second domain I focus on with many of my engineers and other technically minded clients is interpersonal process skills. These skills include active listening, empathy, understanding motivation, verbal and nonverbal communication, asking open-ended questions, and perspective taking. These skills can be trained in both individual and group therapy and can quickly transform a client's relationships. Employing these strategies often creates a virtuous feedback cycle that boosts confidence, safety, and connection in relationships (at work and at home) and provides further motivation for trying these new skills. For a helpful primer on how these interpersonal process skills can be developed and used at work, I like The Art of Humble Inquiry by Edgar H. Schein and Peter A. Schein.
If you are feeling stuck at work and unable to make sense of office politics, difficult co-workers, or managing stress and boundaries with your career, therapy can help!